Once again, I share with you my observations and insights from last night’s football game.  This time, it was homecoming for this town.  Here’s how things went down (in my mind at least).
#1 It’s homecoming. The opposing team colors are orange and white. The home team colors are maroon and white. One of the homecoming court girls is wearing an orange dress. Why in the hell didn’t she do her research?!?
#2 Hah!!! The girl on homecoming court wearing the visiting team colors was a student of mine last year.
#3 Looks like rain in the distance. Too bad it’s actually a fire in a field outside of town.
#4 I’ve been told the visitor side is always this packed for homecoming. However, I know it wasn’t last year. Tonight, I’m seeing the stairs over there disappearing. The Fire Marshall has every legal right to kick some people out now.
#5 The fence line around the stadium is full of people watching the game for free. Leeches. Those cars have been there since yesterday. There are still people trying to find a parking spot anywhere they can.
#6 The visiting team just smoked them on 4th down and scored on the next play. The home defense was outclassed. Then they missed the PAT. That’s why they went for it on 4th down. Hahahaha!!!
#7 I always have wondered if a football team has a designated patsy to fake an injury after they come out on the loosing end of a big play so they can get a free time-out.
#8 HAH! The home team kicker also missed on the same goalposts wide right. There must be something in the water.
#9 The mascot is once again pretty entertaining this week. Too bad for her the game is actually interesting this week, too.
#10 The band just played the “Hey Song.” They normally miss they key signature at one place in the song. The TV cameraman just came up to record the band playing for their “Battle of the Bands.” They missed the key signature on TV.
#11 A block in the back is ill-advised AND illegal. You don’t want to do that. You REALLY don’t want to do that when the guy you’re chasing is chasing your quarterback. That gives him the momentum to sack the quarterback further behind the line of scrimmage than that flag would have cost you. Here’s your sign.
#12 The home team scored out of turn, breaking away from the potential tie. I think that pissed off the visiting team defense. But apparently not enough to keep the home team from converting a crucial 4th down…and scoring again.
#13 The t-shirt cannon is shooting at such an extreme upwards angle that I think the t-shirts are hitting terminal velocity once they hit the crowd.
#14 Ok. This game must be getting boring. I’m starting to write about things other than the game. That’s sad because the visiting team was the supposed 1st place team for the district coming into tonight.
#15 Ok. It pissed off the visiting team’s offense enough. They just scored stone cold. I looked back at The Boss and she had the biggest grin on her face. But then the 2 point conversion was no good. Epic fail!!!
#16 It’s chilly out here. The varsity cheerleaders recognize that. They put on pants. However, the JV cheerleaders don’t have on pants. Did the money run out or is that some kind of cheerleader hazing prank?
#17 The visiting team just scored off an interception. Taste the sweet revenge. However, their special teams still suck. Missed the PAT.
On the kickoff, I’m wondering if it was the same kicker. Couldn’t have been though. That kicker would have made it through the uprights with 6 inches more height.
#18 There are people leaving the game…DESPITE the fact it got good again. They really want to beat the traffic in a town of 14,000 rather than see if their team wins or looses?
#19 The visiting team just intercepted the ball again. I guess that actually means they have the drive to stay undefeated. They better hope the offense supports their cause though.
#20 Some of these game officials are so vigorous and animated when they wave their arms to stop the clock that it appears they are about to take to flight.
#21 91 yard touchdown for the win by the visiting team. Too bad there was a flag for holding. At least they got back on track and out of the shadow of their goalposts. They have enough time to score still.
#22 The Boss now hates this game. It’s about to go to overtime because the visiting team kicker made a field goal when he had to. However, had he made the rest of his kicks, the game would have been over by now and they would have won.
#23 I think we found the formula. The visiting team kicker just made the kick after the home team tried to ice him. Carbon copy of end of regulation.
You’d think the coaches would have thought about it.
#24 The people leaving before OT was over were home fans. Once the visiting won, the home fans EMPTIED out of the stadium. That’s including those home fans packing the fence line.  The visiting fans never abandoned their team.

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